♈ Aries (Mar 21 – Apr 19): Double-check your texts before you hit send, because your “lol” might accidentally start a fight. If you keep your cool, you’ll actually come out ahead of everyone else.
♉ Taurus (Apr 20 – May 20): Don’t stress the small stuff. If your coffee order gets messed up, just call it “character development” and vibe through it.
♊ Gemini (May 21 – Jun 20): Yes, Mercury is your ruling planet — so yes, your Wi-Fi is still gonna glitch. But honestly? Lean into it. You’re funny enough to spin the chaos.
♋ Cancer (Jun 21 – Jul 22): Your feels are extra loud right now, so don’t overanalyze every emoji. If someone hits you with a “k,” it’s not the end of your relationship… don’t read into it.
♌ Leo (Jul 23 – Aug 22): If your spotlight moment gets delayed, don’t panic — it’s just Mercury making you wait for a bigger stage. Use the time to hype yourself up.
♍ Virgo (Aug 23 – Sep 22): You’ve been triple-checking everything anyway, so you’re basically immune. Still, don’t gaslight yourself if something slips through — it’s not you, it’s Mercury.
♎ Libra (Sep 23 – Oct 22): Be careful saying “yes” to every plan right now. Retroshade energy means half of them might fall through — but honestly, that just frees you up for thing you really need to get done.
♏ Scorpio (Oct 23 – Nov 21): If someone’s acting shady, don’t jump to conclusions. Mercury is still stirring the pot, so wait before you clap back.
♐ Sagittarius (Nov 22 – Dec 21): Your travel plans might be a little messy — expect delays, detours, or that one friend who can’t read Google Maps. Pack snacks and roll with it.
♑ Capricorn (Dec 22 – Jan 19): This is cleanup mode. Fix what retrograde messed up — update your passwords, answer the email you ignored, and re-organize that chaos. You’ll feel so much lighter.
♒ Aquarius (Jan 20 – Feb 18): Your random genius ideas are popping off, but maybe don’t pitch all of them yet. Give it a few days before you accidentally show your hand.
♓ Pisces (Feb 19 – Mar 20): You’re still in lalaland, which is cute — until you miss that huge deadline you’ve been stressed about. Stay present and your energy will stay on point.