♈ Aries (Mar 21 – Apr 19)
You’re the first one at the bar and the first one challenging coworkers to a shot race like it’s the Olympics. By 9pm, you’ve accidentally started a dance circle and probably an HR investigation. Zero regrets — iconic behavior only.
♉ Taurus (Apr 20 – May 20)
You’re posted up by the food table like it’s your full-time job. You’re chill, cozy, and absolutely judging the drink options. You leave early with leftovers and your dignity fully intact.
♊ Gemini (May 21 – Jun 20)
You’re bouncing between groups, oversharing, making new friends, and starting rumors without trying. People will absolutely say, “Did you hear what Gemini said last night?” And honestly — you did great. No notes.
♋ Cancer (Jun 21 – Jul 22)
You start the night saying you’re “keeping it low-key”… and end the night giving emotional TED Talks to coworkers you barely know. You cry once, hug twice, and become everyone’s holiday therapist. Classic.
♌ Leo (Jul 23 – Aug 22)
You treat the work party like your Met Gala — outfit popping, hair flawless, camera ready. By hour two, you’ve fully taken over the dance floor and the DJ knows you by name. HR won’t, but the DJ will.
♍ Virgo (Aug 23 – Sept 22)
You’re the only responsible adult in the room, politely reminding everyone where the rideshares are. You refuse to get messy but absolutely screenshot all the chaos for later. Monday morning? You act shocked like you didn’t witness it firsthand.
♎ Libra (Sept 23 – Oct 22)
You are effortlessly charming, lightly flirty, and somehow talking to three people at once without breaking eye contact. Coworkers leave wondering if you like them or love them — and honestly, you’re not sure either. Stunning behavior.
♏ Scorpio (Oct 23 – Nov 21)
You’re mysterious, enticing, and sipping your drink like it’s a prop in a noir film. Someone always confesses a secret to you and yes, they should be afraid — you keep receipts. You leave early, glam, unbothered, and unreadable.
♐ Sagittarius (Nov 22 – Dec 21)
You show up, blow up the vibe, and leave before anyone knows what happened — ultimate Irish goodbye energy. You’re fun, wild, and slightly feral by drink three. HR doesn’t scare you… but maybe it should.
♑ Capricorn (Dec 22 – Jan 19)
You arrive straight from a meeting, take one sip of something expensive, and network like it’s a LinkedIn mixer. Work party? No. This is a career opportunity with snacks. You relax eventually — but only after checking how much PTO you have left.
♒ Aquarius (Jan 20 – Feb 18)
You’re vibing on your own wavelength, making friends with the bartender, and starting deep conversations no one asked for. You somehow convince half the office to join a new group chat about something niche. People call you “interesting” — and they’re right.
♓ Pisces (Feb 19 – Mar 20)
You’re tipsy off one drink, living in a rom-com fantasy, and falling in love with the idea of love by the charcuterie board. You cry-laugh, hug everyone, and forget your coat. Honestly? Adorable.